Goofball Compliance

Anyone who has read my blogs through the years knows about my authority figure problems and the creative license with which I face life issues. Recipes are suggestive outlines. Recent government mandates are a big WELL NO! Sewing patterns are merely opportunities for me to display my imagination.

There are a few things in which I try my hardest to release my will to the directions of those whose wisdom in certain areas of expertise eclipse my knowledge. To understand (or have a laugh) check out my free ebook, A Goofy Grammie’s Guide to Gluteus Medius Surgery. I mostly followed instructions, made up some others as I went along, and ended up being able to walk well again.

Sometimes, I succeed in following cautions and guidance. Some even long term. But like the list of exercises from my physical therapist, I continually have to beat myself over the head to maintain her regimen (aka continue the torture). The heart doctor’s ‘suggestion’ to follow the Mediterranean diet has yet to kick into gear.

But once again, here I am speaking from the experience of another slice and dice session.

I came through the cataract surgery fine.

BUT

In the process of healing, I have to wear the butt-ugliest glasses known to man!!!!

In my attempt to follow the rules, I have faithfully followed the eye drop application routine. I taped the eye cup across the most recently surgeried eye each night for a week at a time. I have used my grabber to keep from bending over with my head lower than my waist. I have failed in that instruction only a few times because of sheer old age forgetfulness.

The glasses rule – wearing them from morning to night – has been the challenge. That combined with the no water in the eyes while washing my hair became a chance to problem solve. My solution works. But as the picture above attests, it is butt-ugly. And hysterical.

When I first got the glasses, I decided all they needed to be good to go was do a dirty pour on the rims. It may have worked had my painter’s tape stayed in place. It was a disaster. My next endeavor was to paint the rims with blue and green nail polish. Had the polish brushes been finer, it may have worked. By the time I tried to remove the paint and polish from the lenses, I couldn’t see out of them.

The pair of glasses that has the bifocal lens at the bottom got a small set of jewels on one side. The sunglasses got jewels on the other side. Still butt-ugly, but better.

Thankfully, they gave me a new set of glasses. I am going to try once again to make the glasses acceptable for human wear, or should I say a weird human’s wear? I will try the nail polish paint again this afternoon using a fine paintbrush. We’ll see if it works this time.

The one thing I try to do faithfully with all my heart is to honor God’s Word. Sure, I fail, but I know God understands and forgives when I do.

I was going to list several verses, but this is one of the best ever!

John 14:23   Jesus answered him, “If anyone loves Me, he will keep My word, and My Father will love him, and We will come to him and make Our home with him.”

Blessings

Kara Beth.                                                                                    BLING!!!

BLING!!! BLING!!!

BLiNG!!

Happy Dance!